WWMD?

couch

Originally uploaded by bellaprincipessa05.

I have spent the better part of the day on the couch drinking wine and watching “Sex & the City” reruns. It’s been a practically perfect day. Anyway, I know some people have problems with the show for various reasons, but in my opinion, ultimately it’s about friendship (male and female). And the power of those friendships. But in the TV show, those ladies can say really tough things to each other and it takes less than 22 minutes to get over it. In reality, that ain’t necessarily so. It’s been a pretty surprising/dismaying year for me in regards to a few of my friendships and so I put on my best pair of men’s underwear, a mismatched pair of heels, a tank top with nipple potential and as I sat on my bed I just had to wonder:
What is it about some friend ships that make them sail into the sunset? (read that sentence one word at a time as if it is scrolling across the screen for full effect.)

Recently, I had a friendship go south. Like REALLY far south. At this point, that friendship is in another season where the toilets flush the other direction. Possibly it is at the tip of South America if not all the way down in Antarctica. I was blind sided and have no idea if it will ever come back to this hemisphere. But while I’ve been in mourning, two OTHER friendships that I had thought were lost came back to me. Like boomerangs I had forgotten I had thrown out, these folks resurfaced and blind sided me- in a good way. In both cases, those people (a guy and a girl) had justifiably asked me to leave them alone, and I did, and then out of the blue they each contacted me and wanted to see me. In both cases, I said yes. Both initial meetings were bittersweet. The first at an IHOP and the second at a Starbucks. The chemistry and affection were still there, although tempered with caution. There were subjects we did not discuss: love life in one case, work life in another. In neither case did we even touch on the history of why things went off the map. I have seen each one of them a second time, and it was easier. It doesn’t feel so much like a “rekindling” as a completely new thing. Albeit with a bit of shared history. But as I thought about these two submarine friendships and the mystery of their resurfacing, something occurred to me: when I was most “in” with both of these people, I felt an obsession to consume them. As if they were each an exotic food that I love but don’t normally have around. Like eclairs or creme brulée. Or pepperoni pizza. And I just couldn’t get enough. (Bear with me as I continue this food metaphor….) That lead me to think about the people in my life who are more like staples: Shannon, Karen, Mike, Martin, Jo Anne, Paul, Brooke, Sara, Kip, Henry, Steven, Holly, Jen, Dave, Charlene, Matt, Marypat and Tripp. These folks are my coffees, milks, butters, breads, cheeses, wines, ice-creams, and yes, vegetables. I never get tired of them, and I don’t ever fear about getting enough. My relationship to all of them is calmer. I’m hoping that my “new” friendships with my “old” friends will become staples, too. I need some pasta and peanut butter in my cupboards. And as for the friendship in the big freezer in the basement? I don’t know. I mean, what would Miranda do?