Small Thoughts on a Big Day

Last night I hung out with Karen and she put the screws to me about writing more often (love you, lady!) Anyway, it’s kind of a strange time here in ye olde Hollywood. I think the climate of anxiety regarding the Presidential election is echoed in the climate of the business. SAG has a big election for a new board and the ballots are due on Monday. I don’t know that a new board will be much better, but at this point, I really feel that something has GOT to change. Everyone is nervous and I have felt this way for about a year- prior to the “possible” Writer’s Strike which turned into “probable” and then “oh crap, existing.” Anyway, I think that once the election (Presidential and SAG) is over- no matter who wins- things will be better. It’s hard for me to live in limbo and that’s what it seems like I’m in. I think that’s what everyone is in. Last night I dreamed that I moved back to Chicago. It’s funny because I’ve been doing some real research about moving to London, so to dream about moving to Chicago seems appropriate. I lived there right after college for 3 years and they were the 3 most formative years of my life. I had so many firsts while I lived there, in fact, almost everything was a first: first time I lived alone, first cat, first boyfriend, first (and only, frankly) time getting fired, first REAL winter, first auditions outside of school…..everything was New and Challenging and Rewarding and Possible. Last night Karen and I were talking about how things seem “the same” here. Nothing seems to be new. And maybe that’s why I want the challenge of being in a new city. I want to be New and Challenging and Rewarding and Possible. Today I have a callback for a commercial that shoots in New York. I want to get it. Although it might not be my definition of New, Challenging or Rewarding, it’s definitely Possible. Or better yet, Probable. And maybe that’s the Challenge- making this lovely life that I have now New and Rewarding. I happen to be a big fan of seconds. Mmmmm, delicious.